“As long as we are on our earthly pilgrimage, far from God, He must be the constant yearning of our souls” (Divine Intimacy 544)
“Please hold” I heard on the other end. And so it began, first I was fine thinking it will only last a couple of minutes. But 2 minutes became 5 which turned into 10 and at 15 minutes my patience was wearing off. I began to consider the lack of courtesy on the tellers part for keeping me on hold for so long then I turned to the conversation I had earlier that morning with a friend and the things I could have gotten done if I hadn’t spent so much time with her. The chores that I had yet to accomplish plunged me into anxiety which led to frustration. Every passing second became a sting of wasteful time doing nothing. Finally, the teller returned to the line and completed my request. I took a deep breath so as to make room for prudence and charity and kindly ended our interaction.
Waiting; not very many of us know how to master this act. All of us have had to do it but some of us are wiser than others when it comes to filling its void. We somehow miss the invitation Jesus places before us during those moments when all is on pause and stillness settles in. We miss yearning whispers in our soul reaching out for an encounter with the Lord. Sometimes we are so immersed in the present hardships, pains or mysteries of life that we fail to see how God is working through them. We wait for him impatiently to act and miss his every step. The presence of God which permeates our very being doesn’t seem interesting enough for the passing minutes. The rosary sits on the table, Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament a drive away, the bible lies on the bookshelf and we wait in silence and isolation. At times allowing these graces to go unseen or untouched.
All it takes is an inclination of the heart! Life is filled with unanswered questions, with desires yet to be filled. Waiting for God to respond can be as frustrating as waiting for a teller to complete our request. We find we do not have patience for any other agenda but our own. Divine as God is, his agenda is sometimes frowned upon specially when it creates gaps and changes in our own.
A prayerful approach prepares the heart for Jesus to enter, aiding the interior void. We can be totally at peace with the unknown and willing to wait on Jesus and his promises but what we forget sometimes is that we might be waiting for the rest of our life. The gifts God wants to give us, the promises he wants to make, might not come in this life time. He could be holding back in order to prepare us for the ultimate response. He might be putting us on hold until the day we die so that we can rise to the fulfillment of all that we could ever want and need. Eternal life is worth the wait. Meanwhile, on earth, he continues to approach us in the form of our neighbor, he reaches into the recesses of our heart during prayer allowing us to steady our inner-self in love and transform our outer-self into a vessel of charity. This is a consolation! If we love with the heart of Christ while we wait, and if our heart has become one with his then it is certain and definite that God will answer our every request. And Eternal life will be our ultimate reward.
“Prayer alone will not suffice to draw down divine graces, nor will it acquire eternal life for us. Fraternal charity, the surest pledge of the sincerity of our love for God is an absolute requisite.” (Divine Intimacy 544)